i wonder why i can’t stand christian music anymore?
maybe i abused it too much. very little of it even inspires me. some of it brings up things i’d much rather let go of. but really, it all just sounds the same. i feel like my local ccm station cycles the same 15 songs every hour. it’s all the same kind of song: difficulty or doubt in a person’s life. it gets depressing. we all like to relate, but we have to be careful to not be driven so much by emotion. focus on Him and not ourselves.
my keyboard sits in the corner of my room covered in clothing. my binder, containing pages and pages of lyrics, is collecting dust under my bed. maybe i just grew up. maybe i just gave up. why did i have such a passion for it? what happened? it’s almost like i’m trying to hold onto it in a way by alluding to it’s impact on my life every now and then, but that seems to be the only connection i have with it now. when once a path seemed so clear, it now feels totally abandoned.
i may resort to sharing my lyrics with you. they’re chapters of my life that i’ve moved on from, songs that i wouldn’t want repeated over and over again. but they are apart of my story, and maybe i should bring them to life in some way. maybe the desire will return, maybe it won’t…but at least i won’t feel like i’m keeping a secret. or that i’ve wasted my time.
so be forewarned. for the sake of content, i’ll be sharing glorified poetry with you in the very near future.