nothing can betray our beliefs swifter than our actions. they are the springboard of all that we do, whether we know it or not.
why do i struggle? why do i find myself in bondage? well, the answer lies in my belief: is it truth, or a lie?
(i know my teachers/mentors will appreciate the use of this:)
believe > think > feel > act
what you believe affects how you think; what you think affects how you feel; how you feel affects how you act. if the end result is sin/disobedience, then your belief is based on a lie. ridiculously elementary, i know…but realizing that has allowed me to know where to begin as i try and figure this all out.
for me, this whole idea of freedom has been difficult to grasp. i’ve been so embedded with structure and routine and dos/don’ts, that i can’t see past the box i’m in sometimes. not to say that boundaries and routines are wrong, but like many other things used in excess, they can do harm.
as i’ve studied, bondage and slavery all coincide with sin. Christ set us free, truth sets us free. so my struggle has essentially revealed to me that my belief is rooted in some lie. no matter what i know, no matter what i tell myself, my thoughts, feelings and actions betray me.
so, what do i do now?
well, i’ve learned that knowing the truth is necessary to freedom. my life is testimony enough to that, and continues to be so. life continues to amaze me. and it never fails: as i stop and look back to thank Him for how far He has brought me, and serve Him wholeheartedly where He has me now, something happens to allow me to look forward to what’s ahead…as if it’s some sort of surprise that there isn’t all there is. there’s more. but hope requires some exercise in freedom, too, and that’s something i still have to work on.
but the story isn’t over. not yet.
one small step at a time. no rush.